Someone shoot me.

Full House makes my head hurt. Why do I watch it?

uh-WITH uh-TEETH-uhhh

[WITH_TEETH] is out today. I looked for it at Wal-Mart at about 3:15 AM. I didn't think they'd have it, and I was correct in my assumption. So I'll have to swing by Best Buy on my way to work. I did make a stop at nin's online store, which just opened, and suprisingly, they're selling the CD for $10.99, cheaper than amazon.com and probably cheaper than Best Buy. And they're selling the Still CD again, so if you never got Still, GO F***ING BUY IT. Even if you don't like NIN, Still is a great little CD to relax to and it's only $9.99. Seriously. My mom likes Still. It was in my CD player once when she borrowed my car. This request isn't about my "man-crush" on Trent; it's about the fact that he's had all of his money literally stolen from him by his former manager, and I'd like to help him get paid. I'm a capitalist, and I could give two s***s about his politics. So that's why I'm pushing the new album now. I downloaded it because I'm going to buy it, and I encourage everyone else who downloaded it to do the same. And if you're not interested in With Teeth, give Still a try. It's a lot of mellow, put-you-to-sleep piano music. Speaking of sleep, I should be in bed, or I'm going to sleep in and not get the new album before work.

{/incoherent rambling off}

What the Full House?

Why the hell did Full House ever have an 8 season run? X Files had a 9 season run. Star Trek TNG, DS9 and Voyager each had 7 season runs. Shit, Friends had 9 seasons. Who in the hell watched Full House? I see there are tons of people on the imdb message boards, chatting it up about how great the show was... I guess I'm just trying to figure out what they're smoking.

File this under random anger-babble...

Oh, that liberal media

The search for WMD is over... again.

Wrapping up his investigation into Saddam Hussein's purported arsenal, the CIA's top weapons hunter in Iraq said his search for weapons of mass destruction "has been exhausted" without finding any.

Nor did he find any evidence that such weapons were shipped officially from Iraq to Syria to be hidden before the U.S. invasion, but he couldn't rule out some unofficial transfer of limited WMD-related materials.

Ok, didn't this get reported weeks ago, or is this a different outfit saying the same thing again? Of course it's headline news again, and Allah forbid the MSM would report about any good news in Iraq. And you have to love this single-sentence paragraph:

The Bush administration justified its 2003 invasion of Iraq as necessary to eliminate Hussein's purported stockpile of WMD.

Anyone who thinks WMD was the only single solitary justification for going into in Iraq is a liberal tool. Go ahead and whine your head off about how "removing a brutal dictator" was an afterthought because of the lack of WMD. Then read the 2003 State of the Union Address and explain why you're still whining. Maybe it's because I actually followed the whole ordeal from 9/11 that I wasn't suprised, and I didn't feel lied to. Because I actually knew what was going on. Let the THC drain from your system for a few days, and you'll probably realize that America isn't such a bad place after all. Hey, I'm no blind patriot, but you have to admit that this really isn't a cesspool of slime and vermin that Michael Moore pretends it is to sell books. Well... speaking of Michael Moore... Noam Chomsky... and Ward Churchill... yeah, I guess you're right. America is a cesspool of slime and vermin.

P.S. Wasn't it the CIA's faulty intelligence that said that WMD was there in the first place? Should we really be trusting the CIA with this report that there aren't any?

Generation Rx

Holy crap, more real news I decided to blog on... It seems that 20% of all teenagers are turning to prescription drugs to get high, instead of pot.

NEW YORK - About one in five teenagers have tried prescription painkillers such as Vicodin and OxyContin to get high, with the pill-popping members of "Generation Rx" often raiding their parents' medicine cabinets, according to a study by the Partnership for a Drug-Free America.

The 17th annual study on teen drug abuse, released Thursday, found that more teens had abused a prescription painkiller in 2004 than Ecstasy, cocaine, crack or LSD. One in 11 teens had abused over-the-counter products such as cough medicine, the study reported.

Is this really a bad thing? The kids aren't using street drugs. So either, they're getting the picture, that they shouldn't do street drugs, and are turning to regulated substances that are deemed safe enough to be sold in a drug store, OR they're proving that they should legalize some of those street drugs and regulate them. Of course, what will really happen is that government will just put higher restrictions on these substances and make them harder to get. Dammit... I mean... I don't care.

Oh yeah, Laura, Vicki and Cody don't think there is anything for government to worry about, and they intend to write their local congressman. As should you.

That Certain Shade of Green

What's this? Real news commentary? Well, I've been saying it for years, and moreso since I started driving as a job. Traffic lights are programmed to stop as many cars as possible.

Backed up at a traffic light? Frustrated when you hit a red light only a block after driving through a green? Odds are, those traffic signals may need some work.

...

A new survey being released Wednesday says the nation's traffic signal operations are largely inefficient,

Well, I guess they're not programmed that way, but they really need some work. The strange thing is that as I recall, downtown Rochester used to be decent, except for Civic Center Drive, which has been screwed up since they built it. However, since they did a bunch of construction on Broadway several years ago, just about all the traffic lights downtown have been fucked. This is really when I noticed. Specifically, the light at 16th street and south Broadway, used to let cars go very shortly after they stopped, until one night I sat through a whole cycle in the turn lane and realized that something got screwed up in it. And don't get me started on the lights at the 19th street bridge over 52, but those are temporary because of construction. ::mumbles something profane about Roc-52::

First the ridiculously low speed limits, and their potential increase on the horizon, and now a group of engineers announcing that I was also right about crappy traffic lights. What driving gripe of mine will be proven valid next?

No words or so much skin

According to the career-music-store-employee sources at the nin hotline, With Teeth has been shipped, though obviously not yet available for sale. Some of those employees also happen to be impatient nin fans who have busted open a few boxes and looked at the packaging. There's actually going to be a picture of Trent in it. He's coming out of his shell. And apparently... no lyrics. I'm guessing that this is some sort of joke... how Trent put no instrumentals on the album, so he decided to make the packaging without lyrics. Ha... yeah. Whatever. And this album was supposed to be mostly about the lyrics. There better be official lyrics on the official website when it goes live officially. I hate not knowing lyrics. I can't listen to music when I don't know the lyrics. Bugs the ever-living crap out of me. Even though... due to the leak, I know pretty much all of the lyrics to the whole album, but there are some lyrics, particularly "You Know What You Are?" that I can't fully make out. I'd rather not wait for a non-sold-out concert to lip-read and figure out what he's saying. Especially because I can't lip-read.

Oh, and as an update to the preliminary review of With Teeth, and as an opportunity to use the word "officially" twice more... the entirety of the new album has officially grown on me. It r teh r0x0r, all the way through. I was actually going to mention this on Monday, because it had completely grown on me after about 2 or 3 complete listenings over my shift on Monday. Anyway... like you cared. "WTF? Why is he blogging that he likes a CD in it's entirety??"

Witha Teetha...

With Teeth kinna got leaked. No, not track 7 from the album; the whole album. So I have it. No, I won't give it to you. It's not that hard to find yourself. It was leaked last Thursday, so you shouldn't have too much trouble. I did it myself, with a nudge from Will, but his help wasn't entirely vital. As for the album... it kicks ass. Two or three tracks are going to have to grow on me, but that's normal for a NIN album. First listen, it was off-putting. The thing about new NIN is that when you get a new, full-length album plopped in front of you, it's understandably off-putting because of how long we went without new material. But most of the songs were either great on the first listening or great on the second. Like I said, only two or three tracks haven't taken root yet. I'm still going to buy the real thing when it comes out in a few weeks, of course, as should you, free-loading vagrant. Get a job. Here's my personal quick review of the album... your mileage may vary:

01 All the Love in the World: The send-off for the album is immediately in the "off-putting" catagory because of the drums. Usually, when Trent uses synth drums, he still does a great job with them, but I'm sure this is a stylistic choice. The hook is simple and catchy. And the layering of voices at the end is pretty sweet. Trent actually sings more than screams here. Not that he can't scream on key, but it's just a bit different. (Edit: I said off-putting, but I didn't say that I really liked it. It's unusual for something Trent put together, but it's still really good.)

02 You Know What You Are?: I had to place this in the "needs further review" catagory. It's fast-paced and pretty cool, but... I don't know. That's why it needs further review.

03 The Collector: Ok, this is With Teeth's entry to the "fucked-up time signature" collection of Trent's portfolio. It's also cool, but it hasn't grabbed me yet. It's close, but I just seem to forget it. Maybe it just gets drowned out by all the great stuff that comes later.

04 The Hand That Feeds: Well, if you haven't heard this by now, why are you even reading all this shit?

05 Love is Not Enough: I know, it sounds like a Bond movie. Close. This is growing on me, but it's not quite there yet. It's easier to describe the ones I like... because I can't put my finger on what I don't like about the few that I don't like.

06 Everyday is Exactly the Same: The first track on the CD I liked immediately. This track rules. It starts off with a neat little, out-of-tune piano, and then the synth stuff jumps out at you. The lyrics work better, and you can actually hear Trent sing again.

07 With Teeth: This one has grown on me, though the chorus is still a bit funny to me. The chorus is just "With Teeth" repeated four times, except Trent says it like the title above (A-with-uh teeth-uh), which is the way I wrote it down when I was writing out the lyrics. So, I probably ruined the song for myself because I did that. But I like the song as a whole. The chorus, though a hair silly, is forgivable.

08 Only: Trent goes back to his Down in It days and puts together a spoken-word song. He even references Down in It directly, by mentioning that tiny little dot that caught his eye... turns out it was a scab. This track took a second listening, but I like it. I guess, all I'm doing is saying "I like it, or I don't like it yet" rather than describe the song, but I'm not a fucking music review writer so shut up, I'm trying. (PS - This is apparently going to be the next single, after "The Hand that Feeds.")

09 Getting Smaller: One of the tracks that was leaked already. This sounds like a Foo Fighters song, but with Trent singing, and heavier, crunchier guitars. That's not a bad thing, mind you.

10 Sunspots: This song sounds almost like Weezer or something like that... I think it's the bass and the simple drum riff. The refrain sounds more like older-school NIN. It's a cool song. There's this interesting synth sound at the end, which people have said sounds like a drill, I hear the drill, but after hearing it in my car, it sounds more like a blender or a mixer... not that it really matters what home appliance it might sound like.

11 The Line Begins to Blur: When I first heard this leaked on the net, I had the same problem I think a lot of people had, and that is that the guitars sound like they're clipping (that they're too loud/heavy). At first, I thought maybe it was a shitty rip that had been normalized wrong and clipped the guitars. But it grew on me pretty quick, and it actually sounds right to me.

12 Beside You in Time: This is the track that's used in the teaser trailer on nin.com. Basically... if you've watched the trailer, you've heard this whole song. The pieces from the trailer are just repeated longer, and then there are lyrics not in the trailer. I was really anticipating this track, because of that trailer, and it's not as huge of a pay-off as one would expect from Trent, but it really still is a good track.

13 Right Where it Belongs: Wow. Hurt, it's not. The Great Below, it's not. But this is still a damn good track. The weird thing about this track is how fast it grew on me, it doesn't sound like NIN at all, yet somehow sounds like it's perfectly normal for a NIN track. It's like a wing of Trent's creativity that was always part of his repertoire, he just never made any songs in this catagory. I can't really describe it any other way. Just buy the album or at least download this thing.

Now that I have heard that in Winamp, that is the shiznite. I'm going to go finish listening to it over one more time and go to sleep.

iChangemymind

Like Brad Pitt with the new Beetle, I too have changed my stance about a piece of pop-culture technology. I've decided that I no longer hate the iPod. At first, I thought of it as an icon of yuppie, hippie college kids, and being an Apple product, I thought of it as annoyingly flashy and expensive. All of Apple's products are ridiculously over-priced when they're first released, and initially the iPod was only suitable to early-adopter budgets. It was only recently that the iPod worked it's way down to a more practical price.

See, when the iPod Mini's came out, I noticed their prices were similar to the regular iPod, but had smaller capacities and shorter battery life. My first thought was of those three, big, capital letters, "WTF?" Some months later, the iPod Shuffle caught my attention again, but at first, I didn't get it. I saw "iPod" and then I saw "$99" so I assumed it was merely an accessory for the regular iPod, because there's no way you could buy an iPod for anything under three weeks salary, right? Well, I still like Apple computers, and I found out through browsing their site that the Shuffle actually was a tiny iPod that sold for $99 or $149 for the 512MB or 1GB versions, respectively.

I could never figure out what yahoo could fill up a 30GB iPod anyway, because all the mp3's I have on my computer take up a bit over 6GB and I don't even listen to half of them. So the Shuffle looked much more practical and upgraded my opinion of the iPod from "contemptible" to "remissible." Then, I noted that iPods prices have gone down across the board.

So, in summation... you may see me owning one someday. I've been thinking about it. Not seriously, but if I had an extra $400 laying around, I'd do it. You might be shocked to know that I actually went and looked at the iPods at Best Buy the other night. But after I'm done writing this, I'm going back to apple.com to check prices there (there are student discounts on iPods, just like on their computers).

The reason I bring all this up is the fact that I heard this news story on the radio on Monday, about George Bush's iPod, and I thought it was ironic. Trent Reznor went out of his way to complain about a presidency that hasn't affected him in the least and whined his angst-ridden heart out about corporate greed, yet bought iPods for his entire staff because apparently Apple isn't a large corporation looking for a buck. The iPod I saw as a staple of the artsy, know-it-all, liberal college student's lifestyle is now shared by the man in the White House that they all hate for no good reason.

And before you ask, no, I didn't change my mind about the iPod just because W has one. I was coming around already. The irony of the situation just made me decide to bring it up, and I came to the conclusion this week.

And on a side note, being tax week, I'm sure many people are using their returns to buy iPods, as I would probably do if I had a tax return over $40... and if I hadn't done my taxes back in January and already gotten my return and spent it 10 times over (you slackers.. happy tax day).

Update: Oh yeah, here's a brief history of the iPod, if you're curious.

Can I help you... Saddlebags?

Apparently, overweight people aren't treated as nicely by retail employees.

Investigators found that when women wore a prosthetic suit designed to make them look obese, they were treated more rudely, and received fewer smiles and less eye contact from sales clerks at a Houston, Texas, shopping mall than when they shopped without the fat suit.

First of all, I call bullshit. Forget about the fact that it's likely that they had a preconceived theory and set out to 'prove' it. From my experience working in retail, on the average, the customers who give retail employees the most shit were overweight women. Don't ask me why. Let me stress "on the average," because obviously you'll always be able to find a stupid bitch in any weight bracket (and either gender, of course). Of course, I always treated every customer the same--with the same contempt and lack of respect.

But say it is true, and obese customers are treated worse than those with a quote/unquote "normal" weight. They fail to mention in the 'study' that the door swings both ways. Ask anyone in retail, they'll tell you. Customers tend to head toward more attractive employees to be rung up. Attractive waiters and waitresses make more in tips. My old manager at Spencer's, Dee (if you're reading this, you probably know her), told me once of a customer who demanded someone else ring her up because she thought Dee was "ugly," (the little bitch didn't get her way because Dee was the only one there).

The article makes it sound like retail employees are these evil, sadistic people. They do it all the time, especially around the holidays. They make it sound like all retail employees are on this constant power trip, and want to make your shopping experience as unpleasant as possible, when it's usually the customers who are unreasonable and overly demanding. Whatever. I don't deal with customers anymore, so screw them all.

Al Gore, King of All Media

As if the internet alone wasn't enough, Al Gore is taking the initiative in creating a cable channel.

The former vice president and longtime Internet champion joined investors Monday to announce the creation of Current, a cable TV channel that will target younger viewers with a blend of news, culture and viewer-produced video.

Maybe Al is trying to do what Mikhail Moore couldn't. I don't really know. I could be a pessimist, and predict that this channel will be a financial black hole like Air America is, but I'll just wait and see if this is a leftist propaganda channel, directed at young, impressionable and very emotional minds, or if it's just a touchy feely, Nickelodeon for 18-34 year olds.

Day 2 finished

I haven't blogged it yet... Mitch Hedberg's death seemed more important to take note of... I quit smoking. Yes. I quit. No, I'm not quitting... I quit. I'm done quitting, and I'm done smoking. I haven't had a cigarette for almost 50 hours. It would be longer, but since Ben had his thing on Thursday and I went to Winona to visit, I had to have a few smokes for the road. But at roughly midnight on Thursday (Friday morning), I had my last cigarette, and it's now almost 2 AM on Sunday. My computer is going to change to daylight savings time very shortly, and that will add an extra hour onto my clock for how long I've gone without smoking. (Not really) Yes. I did quit. Well, I quit smoking, but I still have to go for 3 weeks supposedly before it's out of my system. So... yeah. I'm not going out to bars or anyplace that allows smoking until at least May. See you later, dudes.

Later, Mitch

Well, the first comedian I had an active interest in has passed away.

Mitch Hedberg, a Minnesota-born comedian who worked in nightclubs, college campuses, television and film in a wide-ranging career, and who struggled with drugs and alcohol, died in New Jersey, his family said. He was 37.

Just so you know, the drug abuse rumors are just rumors right now. He had a prior heart condition, and that may very well be the cause. I don't have any particularly poignant words to say here, so I'll just leave you with this...

"I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later."

Mitch Hedberg
2/24/68 - 3/30/05

Berfday Musings

So my birthday was Friday, and it's the first time I've gotten drunk on my birthday. I turned 24. I've been able to drink legally for 3 years now. Yet drinking is something that I haven't really started doing with any real frequency until the last year or so. Jesus, am I ever boring.

And another non-event that's forever bound to my birthday. 9 years ago today, March 6th, my first serious girlfriend, Tammy, and I started "going out." You know, the high school "going out" definition that a generation earlier called "going steady" where you're boyfriend/girlfriend and seeing each other exclusively. Anyway, we broke up in 1998, but since I'm a wacko for dates (for no reason that I can put my finger on), I'll never forget this one. Yay.

More Randomness

I don't know why I'm blogging this, but I just found one of the dumbest mistakes in cinema history listed on Internet Movie Database.

While in the cave discussing water shortage, water is seen dripping in the background.

It's from "Vertical Limit," starring Bill Paxton and Chris O'Donnell. I saw it playing on FX and couldn't remember the name of the movie so I looked it up on IMDb. Now some other movie started with Angelina Jolie. (I just looked it up. It's "Life or Something Like It." Edward Burns is a funny dude.)

Oh noes!! My trackz0rs haev been stoeled!!1

Awww, Trent's upset that his song got leaked. Of course, leave it up to a Chomskyite with a lot of money to take a cheap shot at the president.

Everybody's got their "internets" and it's everybody's right to share their files and everybody's a bedroom-critic empowered by anonymity.
(Emphasis mine)

I've always wondered what it's like to feel the need to get hung up on a person's shortcomings to make yourself feel smarter or better. Whatever.

Just a warning for you guys, Trent ruins the ending of Million Dollar Baby in his reply because he's a big baby. How very dickish, Trent. What if someone who hasn't seen the movie AND didn't listen to your little song out of respect happened across your little violin-playing rant? I know you're disappointed, because you wanted all those people who didn't like the song to end up paying for your album. Sucks doesn't it? That you'll only make 24.5 million instead of 25 million? You sound like Lars Ulrich.

And why are you getting upset that some people didn't like the song? There are 11 other tracks we haven't heard yet. Of course this isn't really going to change who's going to buy the record. I actually liked the song... it didn't ruin a first impression for me. So... thanks for ruining the ending of Million Dollar Baby for me, asshole. Even though, I sort of already knew the ending of it (because of the euthenasia debate that came up a few weeks ago).

I love all this delusions of grandeur bullshit, too, bud. I want to take down corporate America!!!11!11~!1!!1~~!!~ But wait, Mr. Rezzo, if you take down corporate America, how will we ever get to hear your music? Bye Interscope. Bye Best Buy. Bye Sony. Shit. I can't hear your music anymore. Arr! I hate corporate America! Here's a free iPod everyone, Apple's not a real big corporation. I love my GameCube and especially my X-Box. Nintendo isn't a big company and definitely not Microsoft. I'm sure Pro Tools was made by some starving Marxist in his basement out of leaves and twigs he found scattered about the cabin.

And finally, everyone knows that the leak was a marketing ploy. Next time, if you don't actually want your song leaked, here are some tips. Have a closed set. Do the shoot in takes without playing the song all the way through (like every other video shoot EVER). Better yet, use the track with the voice only and a click track. But, we obviously won't have to wait for a next time because we'll all be dead by the time you make a new album.

Don't get your goddamn panties in a bunch, pal. You're still getting phat paid.

The Hand that Feeds awaits you all...

The fans like myself have been eagerly anticipating the release of NIN's new album, With Teeth. Apparently the new single, The Hand That Feeds, was leaked (possibly--nay, probably--staged). Several radio stations around the country have reportedly played it tonight. There's a crazy-long thread over at the over-worked Echoing the Sound message boards about it. I wouldn't follow the link right now. The server is strained because of it. But I'll show you the highlights of the thread, such as the lyrics, the album cover and the 11th-hour album name-change:

Update: (before the spoilers) I blogged as it was all happening, so here's the final story... Some dude at the video shoot for The Hand That Feeds music video recorded the song on tape and sent it to a handful of radio stations around the country, and the stations that aired it and are now in trouble for doing so. Also, the single is slated to legitimately air on radio stations on March 21st, instead of the previous date which was given as April 11th. I believe this marks the first time Trent Reznor has ever moved a release date forward instead of backward. In a related story, temperatures in Hell have dipped to -13 degrees. Now on to those spoilers...

(Admiral, there be spoilers here!)

Supposedly, here are the lyrics:

you're keeping in step
in the line
got your chin held high and you feel just fine
because you do
what you're told
but inside your heart it is black and it's hollow and it's cold

just how deep do you believe?
will you bite the hand that feeds?
will you chew until it bleeds?
can you get up off your knees?
are you brave enough to see?
do you want to change it?

what if this whole crusade's
a charade
and behind it all there's a price to be paid
for the blood
on which we dine
justified in the name of the holy and the divine

just how deep do you believe?
will you bite the hand that feeds?
will you chew until it bleeds?
can you get up off your knees?
are you brave enough to see?
do you want to change it?

so naïve
to keep holding on to what I want to believe
i can see
but i keep holding on and on and on and on

will you bite the hand that feeds you?
will you stay down on your knees?

And here is the album cover art with the new album title...



(no, before you get confused and start asking me, the album title was not actually changed... but that's the real cover art...)

Stupid Random Thought

Bill Pullman played President Whitmore in Indepenence Day. For some stupid reason, I thought to myself, "what political party do you think Whitmore was?" There weren't really any issues discussed in the movie, so at first I thought it couldn't be figured out. But I figured it out. Vivica A. Fox played a black, single mother who worked as a stripper in California. Her character claimed to have "voted for the other guy." I think it's safe to assume Whitmore was a Republican.

Update: Oh yeah, Jewish people typically vote for Democrats, and Jeff Goldblum's character, who's Jewish, punched Whitmore. I know. It's a stretch.

I Pity Da Foo!

Another one bites the dust

Today, UPN announced the cancellation of Star Trek Enterprise. This is some bull mother-fucking shit. I want to send a heart-felt, "Thanks a fucking lot" to all these moronic pseudo-reality shows that are eating up the airwaves. As far as I'm concerned, this is one of the best television shows still in production. And because they air it on Friday nights (when, contrary to popular belief, even Trekkie's are out doing things), they get lower ratings, and thus it's getting cancelled. Wow, UPN... just looking at your website... your line-up is going to be looking really fucking top shelf. Keep up the good work, dickheads. Think I'm a nerd for getting upset that the show has been cancelled and I can't even see the final season without driving to the cities? Fuck you. TV sucks donkey nuts right now, and they keep cancelling all the good shows. Let's have another season of The Apprentice. Yeah, that's great entertainment right there. Sounds good to me. How about another season of Survivor? You got it. Fear Factor? No problem. I can see all the CSI's getting cancelled, too, because they require more thought than your drooling, reality-show fans can squeeze out of their seven brain cells. Way to go, television industry. I hope you're fucking proud of yourselves for all this garbage wasting the airwaves.

Update: I calmed down a half-notch when I discovered that they do still air Enterprise in the middle of the fucking night here in Rochester. So I actually can watch the final season of this show. And any Trekkies who happen across my blog, and think I'm an idiot because you think Berman and Braga suck at Star Trek, let me just say this... "Fuck TOS." (And forgive my language, I'm still fairly angry.)